Qutting the GOP

I tried to keep this on the down low, but those liberal media asshats at TIme magazine broke the story.

To wit:

Samuel Wurzelbacher, better known as Joe the Plumber, tells TIME he's so outraged by GOP overspending, he's quitting the party — and he's the bull's-eye of its target audience. But he also said he wouldn't support any cuts in defense, Social Security, Medicare or Medicaid — which, along with debt payments, would put more than two-thirds of the budget off limits.

Who's up for joining the Plumber's Party

Bill Gates Emailed Me!

So Bill Gates sent me this email. He said to me

Dude, I read you said this:
"I don't like it. You know, me or -- you know, Bill Gates, I don't care who you are. If you worked for it, if it was your idea, and you implemented it, it's not right for someone to decide you made too much."
Thanks for name drop, and that I shouldn't have to pay more taxes. But you know, I don't. Percentage wise I probably pay less than you do.

Bill told me about his golf buddy, Warren, who pays less in taxes than his assistant. He sent me a this . It was kind of hard to read because it was all about Hillary, but I got to this part:

Speaking to several hundred supporters of the U.S. Senator from New York, Buffett revealed his puzzlement that he was taxed at a lower rate than many of the lesser-paid individuals working for his company.
Buffett said he makes $46 million a year in income and is only taxed at a 17.7 percent rate on his federal income taxes. By contrast, those who work for him, and make considerably less, pay on average about 32.9 percent in taxes - with the highest rate being 39.7 percent.
To emphasize his point, Buffett offered $1 million to the audience member who could show that one of the nation's wealthiest individuals pays a higher tax rate than one of their subordinates.
"I'm willing to bet anyone in this room $1 million that those rates are less than the secretary has to pay," said Buffett.

I don't know about the math, because I'm a plumber, but I think Warren's making sense.

Give Me Some Time

So everyone is getting on my case for owing about $1200 bucks in back taxes. But even the local accessors office admits they never told me I owed anything. Even so, most of these back taxes are only from a few years ago. I'll get around to paying it as soon as I can.

Now, what if city had left a notice on my truck window, saying that I owed $10 or $15? What if the city left about 17 notices over a few years? You'd probably expect that I'd have to go pay those as soon reasonable possible. Right?

Well, you would, unless your Obama.

According to this, Obama got a bunch of parking tickets while getting his liberal elistist law degree, between 1988 and 1991, and didn't pay them promptly. Actually, he didn't pay them until January of 2007 (maybe in late 2006). Probably was never going to pay them, except he decided to run for president. Back in 1991 or 1992, when he was graduating, he was thinking, "Screw these tickets, if they really want the money, they can come get in me in Chicago. Besides, I'm a lawyer, I'll know how to get out of paying them."

Now some of you think that a parking ticket is different than paying taxes. Technically, it probably is. But a parking ticket is penalty imposed by the (municipal) government when you don't pay the tax (parking meters), or avoid filing (parking in no parking zones).

I guess my point is, if Obama had 15 years to pay his parking fines, I think I should a few years before I have to pay my back taxes.

Help Buying Business

So, I'm watching TV last night and after hearing my name mentions like 500 times, John McCain says "Joe, I want to tell you, I'll not only help you buy that business blah blah blah taxes blah." To be honest, I didn't hear much after "help you buy that business"

I've been trying call John all day (except when the press keeps interrupting) to ask how's going to help me buy the business. I heard his wife is loaded (and pretty hot, wonder if she has a sister. or daughter). So I'm thinking that they might just buy the business for me, and pay the extra taxes after Obama get elected.

But, damn it all to hell, he won't return my voicemails. I even tried "special" number my cousin got from his father-in-law, Charlie. Charlie says back in the 80's John would always return his calls right away.

So John, if you're reading this, I think I'm going to need like $750K to buy this business, and pay the extra taxes that Obama is going to put on us. And I'll need a little extra for the taxes for your "gift".

Call me.