So after I hit the news, I called Sarah. I really didn't want to meet John that much, but I really wanted to meet Sarah (she's hot). So I left her message. Something like this:
Hi Sarah, this is Joe the Plumber. I can't believe that John mentioned my name, like, a hundred times last night during the debate. Anyway, there are all these reporters on my front yard, and I was wondering what I should tell them. Give me a call.
She never called back, so I went out to my front yard and did the best I could.
Then I was getting called by a bunch of other people, including Katie Couric, so I called Sarah again.
Hey Sarah, Joe the Plumber again. I got this chance to talk to Katie Couric, and I was wondering if you could give me any pointers. Like when she asks what papers I read, what should I say? Anyway, thanks.
Still no call back.
Then Mike Huckabee offers to fly me to New York to be on his show. Guess who's going to be in New York at same time? Sarah! I'm thinking this is her plan all along. Just wait until we can be in the same city at the same time to hook up. Clearly, she doesn't want to come to Ohio, that'd look too suspicious.
Sarah, Joe the Plumber. Just found out we're going to be in New York City at the same time. Maybe we can hook up. I've been wondering if you're hotter in person than you are on TV. Call me.
She didn't call, and I bet she gave that line to the SNL writers.
Bitch.
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